It’s been a while! I figured the best time to stage a little check-in would be during a pandemic. I definitely have better things to do but, since I actually get to choose, I’m choosing to write out all my frustrations, humor and beginnings of alcoholism in this post. Join me, won’t you?
Stage One: Working from Home
My husband already works from home. I hate it. I’ve hated it for years. Any guess as to what I hate more? Snow days. Snow days meant my children would also be home and I would possibly be locked in my home with my entire family all day with no escape. I am now somehow living a perpetual snow day except this one could actually kill me.
I had to slowly work my brain around this since my graduate school’s answer to this pandemic was to add an additional week of Spring Break. It seemed awesome at first but now, as I’m ending week two, it’s just as miserable as everything else.
The only thing worse than everyone being home all day is my new role as homeschool teacher. In my previous life the only job I hated the thought of more was Kardashian sister. Wait…that’s not a job…so I guess homeschooling my kids was my number one worst nightmare. Turns out, my mind was not exaggerating this abomination.
My school district is doing an amazing job of organizing these little monsters and outfitting them with daily lessons, Google chats, meets, greets, videos and every other conceivable online learning tool you can think of. My kids sit down dutifully at 8:30am and then announce they are “done!” by 10:30am. They have not worn actual clothes in over a week, posted 1,348 Tik Toks, are eating straight out of a giant container of Goldfish I had to wrestle out the hands of an elderly man at my local market (worth it!) and have taken to watch the entirety of Stranger Things at least three times over.
Don’t get jealous.
Stage Two: Public Shaming
It started out slowly in my feed and then it basically took over. I realize I am now slathering you all with my opinion but whatever…get your own blog.
I could not stand how much everyone was bashing the kids in Florida. Seriously. Do you all honestly forget what is was like to be a 20 year old in college? Your entire world revolves around your immediate needs which most likely include equal parts drinking, hanging out with your friends and sex. The end. You don’t think you’re ever going to die, let alone from some “old person’s disease” that is everyone else’s problem and certainly not yours. These kids don’t watch the news and the only thing they have been thinking about for the past 190 days is spring break. That.is.it. I did some VERY stupid (although amazingly fun) things when I was in college and I’m sure you did too so please stop. And for the love of God stop shaming their parents! Holy shit. What if we took the worst thing your kid ever did and plastered it all over social media?
Put your phone down and stop commenting Karen.
You know who we should be shaming? The adults who are supposed to be governing Florida. Close the beaches and the restaurants and there is no way for these kids to infect each other and the elderly that make up 90% of the population.
Also, everyone is dealing with this differently so you do your quarantine thing and let everyone else do theirs. Don’t make me post the counselor control chart. Spoiler: the only thing you can control is you.
Stage Three: Food Shopping
I had serious anxiety about going to the grocery store for the fist time. Fine, I have anxiety every time I have to go! The media (and many, many people on my FB feed) would not shut up about how empty the shelves were as endless photos and videos of people hoarding water and toilet paper streamed in real-time. WTF is wrong with these people? If everyone would just buy food and paper goods as they normally would, there would be no issue. I mean, how can so many people not understand this?
Side note: I counted all my rolls of toilet paper immediately and my husband estimated we are good for at least two months. That is how much toilet paper I normally have on hand. Thank you Amazon monthly subscription.
Or…no thank you? WTF? I always knew I couldn’t live without Amazon. *insert hot, angry tears*
Stage Four: Running + Meditation
Obviously I’m most grateful for running and that I can get outside and do it most days. I need it now more than ever and it never fails to put me at ease and shove me face first into a better mood.
I’ve never had much luck with meditation. I hate to not move and staying inside my head while focusing on my breathing just seems like a waste of time. But then, a dear friend who really understands me, sent me this…
There’s a Part Two. They work especially well after you have seen the living room and/or kitchen of every newscaster in America. There’s just something so very wrong about seeing the inside of the local weatherman’s house. Just no. We have an app for that.
Stage Five: Acceptance
Hahahaha, you didn’t really think I would accept any part of this did you? There’s no acceptance. For the first time ever I have full confidence in the president of the United States and I’m sure this will all be over (one way or another) very soon. God Bless America and bless his teeny tiny ignorant heart.
I know one thing for certain, I chose to go back to school for all the right reasons and in the right career — clinical mental health counseling — since the world is going to take a long time to recover from this, and I want to be there to help.
Stay well, be kind and keep washing your hands!
How are you doing through all this?
What is the best and worst thing you have seen or heard since this all started?
OMG, I was just thinking the other day that I wish you were blogging more regularly and imagining all the funny things you would have to say about this. I need all the laughs I can get right about now! Thank you for delivering!! “Breath in through your nose, and out through your ass” 🙂 xo
Well I’m glad I got the timing right for you! And I seriously watch that meditation once a day because if I don’t laugh, I will never stop crying!!
Well said to all of this. And I’m also so thankful to not be the only mom who feels trapped. I am not the homeschool mom type. But so many of friends are all about this and posting sappy sweet things. Me? Head barely above water. Probably because I’m juggling a newborn toddler and teen. The teen is easy tho… lol
I have no idea who the moms are that have all of this organized and together because most ALL of my friends seem to be struggling!! And I cannot imagine the chaos you have been dealing with — what a time to have a newborn! Hang in there my friend 🙂
I could easily write my own entire blog post in a comment, so I’ll try to refrain. The public shaming… yes… publicly shame TRUMP (which we are… the memes are so good)… and those above age 30 maybe. I am so glad my kids are old enough that I don’t have to help them with any of the homeschooling! And I actually feel quite grateful that I still get to leave my house some and go to work and see other people (currently 2 days telehealth from home and 2 days in office) and working from home is NOT what I fantasized that it would be. Stay well.
Please feel free to share as much as you like!! And I’m so over Trump and his nonsense. I have to just turn it off because I don’t even think a public shaming would matter to him!!! Grrrrr
And THANK YOU for continuing to go to work and contribute your skills so everyone can stay healthy. I’m sure you’re being safe but please take care of YOU 🙂 And yes, working from home is a nightmare. Welcome.
Anxiety about going to the grocery store? Last week, I went during senior citzen hour–ok, I’m 57 but close enough plus I’m immunosuppressed. The place was packed. Frighteningly so. And they only had 2 checkouts open. I was in the back of a very long line, freaking out. Inside, where no one could see it. Today, I got up at 5 and went to a different store and it was an amazing experience. It was me and all the shopper people–I went to the checkout and it was just me, no line.
The hardest thing that happened for me so far, tho, was not hugging my oldest son goodbye when he came over tonight for dinner. I love him, but I just don’t trust him. I’m not shaming or blaming. Just saying…
Don’t even get me started on the ineptitude of this president!
Oof to the grocery store debacle. I’m so sorry that happened to you but really glad you found an alternative. It’s so insane!!! And I’m sorry you couldn’t hug your son – that is awful but you have to take of YOU!
And I don’t think any of us want to get started on this a-hole in the white house. I just can’t.
Stay well my friend!!!
I went through all tbe stages but the biggest challenge was to overcome that feeling of loneliness and helplessness at not being able to move out. Depression had creeped in during that time. I wish I had analyzed it so well as you did and made it more interesting.