That’s a total lie. My hammy has been bothering me ever since I sprinted to a finishing win, on wet grass, last Spring at the Glastonbury Ten Penny Ale Duathlon. Obviously it was totally worth it since I won an actual sword. But now, my race calendar has finally cleared and this is the best time for my ego to take a break from running.
I actually cannot remember the last time I took an entire week off from my most favorite pastime. I think it was when I was pregnant with the twins in 2008. Yikes. I may need to check into some kind of rehab. Luckily for me, one of my very best running friends is a physical therapist and I’ll be seeing her on Wednesday. What kind of rehab did you think I meant?
In the interest of my sanity and well-being of anyone who needs to interact with me, I’ve complied a list of all things that I can occupy my time with this week, until I can be reunited with my one true love:
1. Create Fake Facebook Posts: You know half of the shit out there is made up anyway…at least partially. If I put some time and effort into this, I think I can come up with some killer posts that will gain a lot of attention:
2. Mentally prepare for the holidays: Anyone who has to buy gifts, deal with children and/or relatives during the holidays can benefit from a little mental preparation. I like to take the advice of some people I refer to as the sages of Christmas:
“I don’t know what else to say but, it’s Christmas and we’re all in misery.” – Ellen, Christmas Vacation
“Now wait a minute, Susie. Just because every child can’t get his wish that doesn’t mean there isn’t a Santa Claus.” – Kris Kringle, Miracle on 34th Street
And this whole exchange from Planes, Trains and Automobiles:
Car Rental Agent: May I see your rental agreement? Neal: I threw it away. CRA: Oh boy. Neal: Oh boy, what?
CRA: You’re fucked!
If you mentally prepare, mostly by laying on the couch and binge-watching great Christmas movies, you will be prepared to take on anything! Ok, add several glasses of wine and mix well.
3. Shop: When I say ‘shop’ I mean online of course. After all, I’m supposed to be resting my hamstring. In case anyone reading this is shopping for me, here’s a list of my favorite things:
The Oiselle Katron Jacket. Ok, so I already have it but it’s a great gift to give:
TrailHeads Power Stretch Convertible Mittens. Fine, I already have these too and will be doing a blog review soon!
A Weimaraner dog. I do not have this and don’t want to get a dog just yet but if Santa decided to bring one, how could I refuse? I’ve already mapped the routes we will run together! And his name will be Jordy after Jordy Nelson, Green Bay Packers, wide receiver. Don’t judge me.
4. Swim: I’m assuming this will occupy most of my time (in addition to biking and strength training) so my gift to you is a pool workout. I pinned a bunch of great ones to my board that I cleverly titled “VITA Swims” so this is a sort of mash-up of all of them:
If I survive the week, I’ll see you back here on Friday. I will apologize in advance for any rants between now and then. And yes, the title of this post is 5 Things To Do When You Can’t Run, but I seriously exhausted myself just thinking up these four. Consider yourself robbed.
How do you spend your downtime?
What are your coping mechanisms for getting through the holidays?
Do you swim?