Imagine the glamorous life of an elite athlete, days filled with running, eating the perfect ratio of carbs to protein at every meal and having a massage therapist, physical therapist, coach and dietitian at your beck and call. Sounds like a dream, right?


For the purposes of this post, let’s suspend reality and forget about dealing with sponsors, having to literally earn every single paycheck though blood sweat and tears, ravaging your body for the good of sport and dealing with USATF. Humor me.

RUNNING: It’s actually your job now. Like wake-up in the morning, eat your extremely perfectly proportioned breakfast of jet fuel, pull on your brand new outfit that is free from your sponsor (same goes for your running shoes, of which you have 14 pair!) and head out the door to run. RUN! Because it’s your job! *Cue Chariots of Fire Soundtrack

Chariots of Fire

FOOD: I’m listing this next because, besides running, eating is my absolute favorite thing to do. I dream about a day when I can tell someone my likes and dislikes, the type of training I’m doing and have them plan perfectly proportioned meals based on that information. I picture it prepared to my liking and ready when I am my stomach is at all times. Yes, these are the things I dream about! And I hope I can still have wine.

CLOTHING: Oh the clothing! You never have to think about what may be in the wash, or if that sports bra has seen it’s last training run. You have an overwhelming amount of shorts, shirts, socks and sports bras, that you could probably just toss them once you’ve worn them and *poof* new gear appears overnight. In fact, you must try the latest line of stuff before they market it to the minions because the lowly masses need your professional opinion. This does not suck.

Here - take it all!

Here – take it all!

GEAR: Need a new GPS watch? Of course you do. Your pinky toe doesn’t feel quite right in those shoes? Get rid of them! You want compression socks in every color, make and model? No problem. What about a fitness tracker? Oh right, you don’t need that. People should actually be tracking you.

COACHING: Wake-up, do what your coach tells you, win epic races with prize money, repeat. Don’t worry your pretty little mind about details like speed work, long runs and rest days, it’s all meticuloiusly planned out for you.

Teach me everything you know Alberto!

Teach me everything you know Alberto!

RACING: So you have a lot more pressure on race day since you’re livelihood and career depend on your winning or placing but, you get your own bathroom. That alone should make all the work worth it. You also get to stay warm and/or dry in an elite tent or other accommodations right up until the start of the race. You also have your own bottle with fluids you chose, on the course, set up on a separate table with your name on it. And let’s not forget the fame and glory when you win…and sometimes when you lose. It’s a win/win or win/lose/win, you get the idea.

Meb could come in dead last and everyone would still love him.

Meb could come in dead last and everyone would still love him.

MASSAGES: You want a massage? It’s mandatory you fool, now get your athletic ass on the table and relax yo’self. I’m pretty sure you get to do this once a day if you chose. Everyday.

They even put flowers in your hair!

They even put flowers in your hair!

NAPS: These are required. You know how in the crappy job you have now, a quarterly review with your boss is required? Well, as a professional athlete, naps are now required. NAPS! You now get paid for sleeping.

It's not always pretty but someone has to do it!

It’s not always pretty but someone has to do it!

My question to you is, if you could enjoy ONE of these luxuries for an entire year, what would you choose?

It’s an agonizing decision so, take your time…